You Know You Don’t Have To Act Like a Hoochie To Be Loved, Right?


No, seriously. I’m not even trying to be funny, cute, an ass, rude, or the like. I’m just genuinely, compassionately concerned. Because I’m seeing some of this:

And a whole lotta this:

And don’t even get me STARTED on this:

There’s a lot of over-sexed, ramped-up ratchetness out there and I just wanted to make sure that we all knew this wasn’t a prerequisite for being worthy of love and a relationship these days, despite what media, music and Kate Upton’s rising fame might indicate.

In this sad state, a girl is only as good as the next ass shot, boob-centric selfie, or video vixen twerk. That type of attention is cheap. It's fast. And it's meaningless as it is fleeting.

So, we’re all aware that we're not required to act, dress, walk, talk, f*ck, or pose like a Playboy centerfold to matter, right?

Ok, just checking. Because this whole sexual revolution thing is really getting away from us.

DISCLAIMER: I don't like the term hoochie any more than you do. Ho, whore, slut, skank—they're all equally as bad. I'm not a fan of any of them. For the purpose of this post, being or acting like a “hoochie” is doing whatever with a guy that makes you feel cheap and disrespected. Worthless and shameful. Superficial and inferior. Less than whole and not authentically you. When the attention dies down and you’re left with … crickets and emptiness. If you’ve been there, you know it’s less than fun.

You do not have to subscribe to this "trend."

Know what’s gotten me laid, loved and lusted after infinitely more than my cup size? This:


It’s my closer. It's hawt. And it works.




Because that’s what a guy falls in love with. Sexy—the true essence of sexy—is an amalgamation of confidence, self-respect, being able to bring something to the table, smarts, how one carries oneself, and yes, sex appeal. Note: Sex appeal—not actual sex on a stick.

I’m not saying become a nun. Show a little cleave. Give ‘em some gams. But do it because it turns YOU on, not for some meaningless, easy-to-come-by eye-f*cking. I mean, who wants to get to know and respect the milk when he can eye-f*ck (and, he assumes, other things) the cow for free? You get what I’m saying. You’re beautiful inside and out. Be selective with whom you share all that.